Both Beautiful & True
when accepting defeat becomes the doorway to joy
Welcome to DPP, a weekly newsletter about the real-life trials and tribulations of pleasing, and how I leverage emotional intelligence for proper recovery. Letters land on Tuesdays and sometimes surprise days, please consider me a first-class seat with your inbox?
Inspired by a letter by
, this past Saturday, I went in search of a moment that had to meet two criteria:It had to be beautiful
It had to be true
The following is my transcribed journal entry. Thanks so much for sitting here with me.
Saturday, May 3, 2025
8:28 PM
I’ve been looking for beauty and truth all day.
I feel I’ve failed.
My mind has been cloudy
a fishbowl of
resentment mixed with gloom.
Not fun to be around
not fun to Be.
Walked to the store for salad stuff
in the rain
My inside state, perfectly reflected, outside.
Lettuce in hand, I walk back
still stuck
in my mind.
Thoughts filling each cabin
of my sinking skull
Quickly, they rush in - blasting through mental windows and doors
Not a chance
to properly board up.
With nowhere to hide, I stop.
Listen to the rising tides and whirling winds.
It sounds like this:
What. Are. You. Doing????????
Sink in!!!!
ACCEPT. THE. PRESENT. MOMENT!!!!
Don’t resist! Lean in! FEEL IT!
How many times have we been over this already??
You don’t need to relive yesterday.
You don’t need to stress about tomorrow.
BE. HERE. NOW.
You might miss it!!
How crappy would that be?
Everything happening around you RIGHT NOW. Missed. Because you had to be married to yesterday, or worse, pretending like you’re already dating tomorrow.
Relax!!!!! Please??!
Rounding the corner, almost home.
I walk past a neighbor whose shadow unintentionally reminds me of a book I have,
right inside.
A book that’s been waiting
patiently,
to be appreciated.
Finally promoted from that pile on the table.
I feel a little flicker
a glow of peace
and growing joy
sparked from
the idea of bonding with a new book.
A tangible way to regulate my feelings- aside from journaling this, of course.
Right here, safe. Inside.
I found it (!!!!!!!)
A mundane, ordinary moment.
A moment to me, both beautiful and true.
I’m off to begin:
Born A Crime - Stories from a South African Childhood
By: Trevor Noah
See you on the other side!
Since these letters come out on Tuesdays, and I wrote this on Saturday, I am happy to report that I am several chapters deep into Noah’s memoir. Typically, I read 3-4 books at once, cycling between which one I feel I need in the moment, before bed. Only on a rare occasion does a book fully consume me, make me forget the other titles on my nightstand. This book has done that. Regardless of your take on Trevor Noah, Born A Crime perfectly combines poetic storytelling with humility and humor. I recommend.
I challenge you today to seek out something both beautiful, and true. Then come back and tell me about it- please!
From my post-it bookmark to yours,
kaylen alexandra
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And of course your post about searching for beautiful and true is in fact beautiful and true. ❤️
Miss K....thank you for sharing this beautiful part of you. It's amazing how stressful it can be to not be in the moment. Like, how hard you can come down on yourself by not being present. So often, we are our own worst enemy. ❤️